Being in the hospital is rarely a cause for celebration, and no one stays for the food. Happily, my recent experience with a German hospital was positive – even if the food was a classic disappointment.

10 days overdue, shortly after the arrival of my dad, our baby boy arrived. Our second Berliner, he stormed into the world after just 6 hours of labor at a hefty 10 lbs (4,570 grams).  We are thrilled to finally meet him and enjoy life as a family of four, but had to navigate our way through that first obstacle of getting out of the hospital.

In Germany, you can be discharged quite quickly (even same day) for an uncomplicated birth, but the norm is to stay for three days so they can run an array of tests and standard exams up to the U2. With my dad, husband, and daughter waiting at home, I was anxious to get home and impatiently jumped through the many hoops to be released the next day. This was also partially motivated by the fact that I was starving after a full 24 hours of German hospital food.

This is what I get for food after delivering a 10lbs baby? PHOTO: Erin Porter

For the first pregnancy, I had done my research and written about the experience leading up to it, but I was still caught completely flat-footed by several elements. One of which was the strictly enforced German meal schedule. I knew most Germans preferred their hot meal midday, with a breakfast of bread, meat, and cheese and a traditional dinner of Abendbrot which is…um, more bread, meat and cheese. It did not satisfy after delivering a bowling ball.

I had packed snacks for labor and afterward. During my first labor, I had even munched on chocolate chip cookies after getting an epidural (PDA in Germany). This time went far too quickly for me to eat during the birth, but I ate everything in my bag in the following day.

Lunch at a German Hospital

When I was delivered to the maternity ward, I was a bit late for lunch but they scrounged up the leftover vegetarian meal you see above. It consisted of some kind of breaded Quark, a vanilla sauce, applesauce, and an apple. Ah, one of the dreaded sweet lunches. I still ate everything.

If I had a choice of options, I could have picked between Wednesday’s options of Bouletten (forever yes), colorful vegetable dish with beef, or the vegetarian meal I received. Here is the menu for the week I was in the hospital:

PHOTO: Erin Porter

It is nice that you do have some options. When my husband was in the hospital for nearly a week of observation for high blood pressure he had carefully calibrated meals so they could observe what the medication did and it was very restrictive.

Or I had a friend who was admitted to the hospital shortly after arriving in Germany and, unfamiliar with the meal system, declared “no bread” on her food request for dinner. What she found once she opened the lid was a lonely slice of cheese. Just that. No bread. (Read more from Liv Hambrett including a full account of a German hospital stay here.  I also recommend these other expat accounts of hospitals in Germany from A Sausage Has Two and Ali’s Adventures).

Maybe choice is an illusion. I chose my meal for the next day and was severely disappointed in the chicken in curry sauce with rice and cauliflower I was served. Bland with some fried cutlet, the watery sauce had not an ounce of spice. Had I chosen poorly? Or was I doomed for failure?

PHOTO: Erin Porter

Breakfast or Dinner in German Hospitals

Is it breakfast or is it dinner? Egal. My experience in German hospitals has both meals looking eerily similar.

At the hospital I stayed at the breakfast was in a common room from 8-10am, with the dinner served room to room by an attendant around 6pm. That seemed to be the primary difference as I was served the same rather drab collection of meat, cheese, and bread at both. There was a limited selection of vegetables, fruit, yogurt, plus tea, coffee, and milk. Oddly, there was also nestle cocoa mix to make chocolate milk. Don’t mind if I do!

Alternatives to Hospital food in Germany

If you do want to eat well during your hospital stay in Germany, there are a few things you can do.

My dad partook in the cafeteria meal also available on the grounds. Things were almost uniformly fried and featured the usual suspects like potatoes, pork, a soup, and of course – rolls. Not very inspiring, but it was cheap with a filling meal for under 5 euro.

If you have visitors, I highly recommend they bring you further sustenance. If you run out of friends, you might even be able to order in. I’ve heard some hospitals have take-out menus available.

So even if it feels you might, you won’t actually starve. You may even make it out of there alive.