I recently spent a week semi-anxiously waiting tests results from my doctor. They had told me it was going to be 4 or 5 days (business days) and the test was on a Tuesday, so I kept an ear out for a ring through Tuesday – just to be safe. On Wednesday I assumed I was in the clear and breathed a sigh of relief. At least – I hope I’m in the clear. Unless they somehow missed my results or neglected to call or any number of things that can happen at a doctor’s office and do. Maybe I should call them just be safe?

Hospital in Berlin Photo: Erin Porter

Such is the nature of doctor visits for many foreigners like me in Germany. Not only is there handling of important medical manners with its own distinct vocabulary in a different language, there are a range of protocols and expected behavior that can be quite different from what you are used to.

In this post, I’ll point you to the many helpful posts on health-related topics here at German-Way, as well as give a rundown of what to expect when visiting the doctor in Germany.

A round of “Hallos”

Berlin and – even the rest of Germany – can be notoriously unfriendly. My parents are perpetually perturbed when visiting my city that people don’t smile on the street and seem unwelcoming. Apparently they just need to visit a doctor on their visit.

The only times I’ve received an unsolicited “hello’ In Germany is on a hiking trail, rarely in a tourist shop, and regularly in a doctor’s office. Upon entering there is usually a flurry of activity offering your insurance card (Krankenversicherungskarte) to the harried reception/Krankenpfleger(in) (nurse) and answering initial questions about your visit, there may be a long medical form if this is your first visit, there is the hanging of coats and/or umbrella, then you enter the waiting room to a chorus of gruff “Guten Morgen” or “Hallo“. Once you leave, a curt “tschüss” may also be employed. I recommend a rant via Exberliner on the subject here.

The first time I heard it at my general practitioner I was quite taken aback. Why the sudden agreement to engage in greetings? Perhaps it is the German obsession with talking about their health that they just can’t wait to get started. Whatever the reason, it is polite to greet the people waiting once you enter. I have, of course, found some exceptions like my international-friendly gynaecologist (Frauenarzt) where the German from many patients (like me) is stiff and greetings deemed unnecessary. Once you do see the doctor, you may use the full honorific of Frau/Herr Doktor. Germans love a title.

Hands-off 

Another thing you will quickly notice is how hands-off many doctors in Germany can be. While health care is a hands-on profession, I have found myself in the awkward position of meekly having to ask my doctor “Yes, I really do want you to examine that” to our mutual discomfort. This has been in cases like the annual skin check for funky moles that is included in public insurance where my doctor had me confirm I was really really sure. Did I want to get down to my undies in a cold doctor’s office and have them examine every inch? I mean, no, but I probably should – right? The doctor shrugged and I found myself insisting. The exam got done, but it would have been less uncomfortable if treated as routine and not optional.

This may be due to your health being treated as your responsibility. While doctors in Germany do answer questions, they aren’t quick to volunteer info. It is up to you to know what you need or want and advocate. Also, since Germans are obsessed with Datenschutz (personal data privacy) in all aspects of life, little medical info is kept online or transferred between offices. You really are the expert on your heath and are responsible for giving the doctor the rundown on what is happening with you. You are also in charge of the medications duly given out at the pharmacy (Apotheke) and prescribed by your doctor.

Apotheke PHOTO: Palm Apotheke Marbach Am Neckar

This protection of records affects everything from banking to heath to employment records and if you – god forbid – lose a password you must request access, often in person, and then wait for the mail to give you access. It is highly inconvenient, but indeed private.

FKK isn’t just for the Beach

In my last point I noted the distance between doctor and patient, but maybe they don’t need to get close because everything is on display. A visit to the doctor in Germany almost always involves disrobing. Hurt elbow? Shirt off. Knee sore? Take off those pants! Gynaecological exam? Everything below the waist off. Scratch that, take the top off too because next is the breast exam.

At my gyno there is a small room with a curtain which is almost more ludicrous as you struggle to quickly take off the offending clothes only to exit completely bare and prop yourself up on the table. That’s right, there is no modesty sheet so just take a breath and jump in like at the sauna, lake or park. If you spend any time in Germany you better be prepared for some degree of public nudity.

Appointment Times

Scheduling an appointment at the doctor can also be an adventure. I recently embarrassed myself by showing up at a doctor’s office on a Friday…only to see they are closed on Fridays as they are operating at a local hospital. I must have got the appointment date wrong which was a real rookie move.

Many medical offices will write you an appointment card which is quite helpful when they insist on ridiculous appointment times like viertel nach acht or fünf vor halb zehn. Doctor’s offices don’t generally send reminders, though I do get text reminders from my dentist (Zahnarzt) every 6 months.

But even scheduling an appointment doesn’t eliminate the wait. Wait times for an appointment can be anywhere from a week to several months for a specialist. Once you are at the office, to be kept waiting for an hour isn’t uncommon. I always bring a book.

No News is Good News

My last point goes to the first oddity I noted in this post on going to the doctor in Germany. When you are waiting for important test results in Germany, the only thing to do is wait. For German medical offices, no news really is good news. They only call if you need to be notified or schedule follow-up tests or appointments. This makes calls in the days after an important tests a little fraught. I already hate answering my phone and now nervously wait every blip of the Handy for days afterward. Once the obligatory time period has passed (an impossibly long 4 or 5 business days), you can assume you are finally in the clear.

Do you have any harrowing stories from the German doctors’ office? I’d love to hear them in the comments!

Update: I always enjoy seeing the comments on a post and was lucky enough to see many via social media on this article. Many showed their recognition of the same things I have noted at doctors in Germany. Some did not. Other people were very irritated that they perceived this post as a condemnation of the German health system. Let me assure it – it is not! I live in Germany for many reasons and one of those is how much I appreciate the social services network that provides overall better care for its people than systems in the USA where I am from. That said, it still has flaws and things newcomers should be familiar with. Posts on these types of topics are not black and white but complex. I welcome the comments, but also seek tp clarify that I am a fan of life in Germany, even going to the doctor.