Right now I’m preparing for my Einbürgerungstest (Citizenship test). Part of which revolves around the German culture, the psyche and what it means to be German. I’ve not studied Psychology since school but my latent interest has been well and truly piqued. Whilst the test prepares you for the basics of what German culture is, there is little explanation of how and why it came to be that way.

Cultural norms, the standards we live by, are learned and reinforced by our family, our teachers and our friends, as we grow up within our society. My cultural norms (and those of other foreigners) are different than a person born and raised in Germany. Not a huge surprise there then. Some countries place a larger emphasis on strict conformity, whilst others are culturally looser. Germany is at the tighter end of the spectrum and Britain is not far behind, but the way this conformity is learned (and taught) is quite different.

Citizenship prep book -Photo – Alie

If you don’t behave as the Germans do, someone will let you know. From what local friends have told me it does come from a place of helpfulness, that maybe you don’t know the right way and need to be told. It is not something that is exclusively done to foreigners although we are more likely to find it strange, uncomfortable or rude, depending on where we have come from. This is definitely more common down here in the south than it is in Berlin, most foreigners who have lived in Bavaria will have at least one tale of being ‘corrected’. In these cases it is likely the person receiving the correction wasn’t doing anything wrong, but was simply doing something differently than the norm.

When I first arrived in Germany with a childlike grasp of the language, I strode into town and registered for my first ever German class. No one spoke English and after a lot of gesticulating I was (semi) confident that I was signed up for the right class so I took my newly acquired textbook down to the park to with a coffee to people watch and leaf through it. After securing an optimum bench and quietly daydreaming for a while I was abruptly barked at by an elderly woman with two very cute dogs. I had no idea what she said, she repeated it louder, still none the wiser I broke out my one decent sentence ‘Ich spreche kein Deutsch’ (I don’t speak German).

She then said ‘Is that seat free?’ in perfect English and sat down before I had chance to open my mouth. She scowled at me and leaned closer menacingly ‘You must speak German in Germany’. I picked up my new textbook and showed her the cover. In that second she smiled, her voice changed and she chatted away in English like we were long lost pals. Later, as I got up to leave she reprimanded me again for not speaking German and told me to study hard. There are old ladies like this in the UK too, what I didn’t know is that this was merely the first of a long list of corrections I would receive.

Some come under the umbrella, ‘that will make you ill’, even though I’m a grown woman I’ve still had Germans weighing in to apparently protect my health

• Eating an ice-cream outside in November – It is too cold to be eating ice-cream, you will get ill
• Wearing sandals in April in 25℃– It is too cold to be wearing those, you will get ill
• Sitting on the pavement waiting for a Fasching parade – You will get ill from sitting on the cold floor
• Why isn’t your dog wearing a coat? – It is cold he will get ill (plenty of friends get asked about why their kid isn’t properly attired, generally the lack of a hat at all times of the year seems to be a correction flash point)

The German Rettungsgasse (emergency vehicle lane) is a thing of orderly beauty – Photo – Alie

Others are more simply ‘we have always done it this way’, which I tend to be wary of because I’ve been taught that this leads to complacency and doesn’t allow for innovation, sometimes there is most definitely a better way. ‘Ordnung muss sein’ (there must be order) is deeply ingrained into the German psyche and plenty of corrections come from that, Kehrwoche (sweep week) being a classic example.

At least now when I receive a ‘speak German in Germany’ correction (which happens on a semi regular basis since my English husband and I converse almost exclusively in our native language) I can speak back in decent German.

It is easy to make a cultural mistake; I’ve made a lot . As with any culture the norms are merely a mid point, an average, with huge swings in each opposing direction playing their part. Roosevelt said “Comparison is the thief of joy” which I think most people will agree with to some extent, for immigrants and visitors comparison can also provide a helpful insight into how to behave as the Germans do.

– Alie