The German Way: Life in Austria, Germany, Switzerland

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Interview with Jana and Evan Eggers - Part 2

Also see the Introduction to this interview.

Not Business As Usual
An American Couple in Berlin

Interview - Part 2

GW&M: Do you see your “wired” background as a big help in Germany? Problems? Successes?

Evan: Being a techno-geek, I'm loving the ISDN [high-speed phone connection] and GSM [digital cell phone] service here. Our phones forward to voice mail, which then sends us e-mail with the message (wonderful for road warriors), which then sends a short message to our cell phones. We also have a cell phone with an IR port that allows us to connect to the Net on our computers through it. Handy again, for road warriors like us.

Jana: I know that I would have accepted the position even if we weren't “wired,” but I am sure I would not be as happy and comfortable as I am now. I am very close with my family and having daily e-mail contact with friends and family is key for me, especially given the time difference. Evan and I even got my 85-year-old grandmother (she will kill me for telling everyone her age!) on WebTV before moving here. My dad pronounced it a success (although we were concerned for a while) when he discovered she was getting up earlier each day just to check her e-mail!

Since I wanted to communicate a great deal of what we were seeing to many people, I have started an e-mail journal, which is sent to about 50 friends and family. About every two weeks, I write about what's happened in our lives over the past few weeks to a group of people. It has been fun to hear their perspective on our experience, particularly relating it to their own experiences. This is especially true for my grandparents, as I love to hear their comments on our experiences. I'm learning even more about how I got to be who I am, based on their comments.

And another word of caution to those people considering expatism: I believe that not having as much (or any) Internet exposure has made being an expat more difficult for many people I know here. I would encourage people to be involved with e-mail, including joining lists like the German Way forum, as there are many issues you won't think about until you get here. It is an instant support network in your native language! Nice to have that support behind you.

Evan: The Internet is an indispensable expat tool. I use it daily: to check “current events” lists that keep us hooked up to what's happening in Berlin, to see where a street address is on an on-line map before setting out, to check Deutsche Bahn [train] schedules and book tickets, to get a list of English-language films and where they're showing in Berlin. Not to mention the obvious things like having access to the US news when we want it.

GW&M: What internet service provider do you use in Germany?

Evan: I've used CompuServe for business and pleasure since 1985 or so, and we have local ISDN access here in Berlin and regular analog access in pretty much every decently sized city we've traveled to throughout Europe, including France, Sweden, Italy, the Netherlands, and the UK. I would strongly recommend signing up with an international ISP like AOL or CompuServe (almost one and the same now, anyway), both of which have local access numbers around the world. If you're interested, both of their Web sites will tell you where they have local access numbers.

At their computers
Jana and Evan working at their computers.

GW&M: Working together as a married couple has certain advantages and disadvantages anywhere. But in a foreign country both are enhanced. How have the two of you coped with this aspect?

Jana: Enhanced is right! And add in magnified, intensified, and all the other synonyms! Not even considering working together, we've been told that expats experience a divorce rate double that of non-expat couples. On the one hand I think we have it easier, as many problems arise with a “trailing spouse” situation, as you have explored in an earlier interview. On the other hand, since interaction is increased, so are opportunities for conflict and misunderstanding. Throw in a little work stress and you sure do have a volatile solution. We've coped by being aware that stresses are normal. When I start feeling the pressure build, I try to take a step back and imagine that Evan is just a co-worker, not my spouse. Things don't get as personal that way, but it isn't easy and the only way to conquer it is to realize what it happening and confront it head-on.

Evan, I should have let YOU go first! Ha!...

Evan: Gee, I was going to say that everything is going great and I don't see any challenges at all. Just kidding.

Jana and I have had a great experience working together so far, due both to recognizing and discussing problems before too much pressure builds, and also due to the fact that by pure good fortune our skills are complementary. Jana likes to work on the detailed technical aspects of our responsibilities, and I prefer the business/marketing side.

I have frequently heard it said that one of the best ways to deal with life's challenges is to laugh at them; now I understand and really believe in this. I think we've done a good job at identifying some of those stereotypical things that can plague a husband/wife or worker/coworker relationship, and now we think they're funny when they crop up.

GW&M: While it is probably fair to say that English is the international business language, what have your German-language business experiences been like?

Jana: English is definitely the international business language, but I think what is overlooked is that most business is still INTRA national. Also, unless your products are easy to understand (unlike most software) knowing how to present it in a foreign country means understanding the foreign culture. One of the best ways to do this is to understand the language. Note that I did not say to know the language, but rather understand it. Language is very telling of a culture, as it is the most common way people express themselves. Understanding how a language is used takes you a long way. The problem, of course, is that knowing German isn't so easy, and to compound that by requiring you to understand it... well, it takes years. But, to be clear, it is worth it... and there are certainly many small rewards along the way. I love it when I can communicate with people in their language. I can't tell you how excited I was when I could call our dog kennel and make reservations myself!

Understanding business meetings is another hurdle. Sometimes I understand and sometimes I don't. (Guess that is really the same as in the States.) The nice thing about business meetings is that you can usually fairly quickly learn the business lingo, as you hear it repeated often, so you often know the context at least.

Evan: We work in logistics, and the “official” language of international logistics is English, so we've been lucky in that our not-so-good-but-getting-better-slowly German has been more of an annoyance in our personal lives than in our business lives.

The business language issue has been very interesting for me: most everyone in The Netherlands and Sweden speaks excellent English, right down to the taxi drivers, whereas in France and Germany some of our business contacts are proficient in English, but not all. There is no question that even when dealing with excellent English speakers, you can create a much better perception by being conversant in their native language no matter what country you're in.

That said, even if you're like us and spend as much time in other European countries as you do at home in Germany, there is absolutely no question that having a conversational proficiency in German makes living here much less stressful and more fun.

GW&M: You told me once that you had a relocation agent who was less than satisfactory. What relocation advice would you give expats-to-be?

Jana: Oh, we really don't have time for this, as I could go on for days! So, I will stick with the advice. First, if you don't have a relocation agent in your expat package, talk with your company about getting one. The reason is that (if you get a good one), it will save you loads of time and stress, thus making you more productive much faster. Expat assignments are expensive and many result in failure, which costs the company more than a relocation agent does.

Second, if you have a choice in who your relocation agent will be, then do some research. I highly recommend a relocation agent who is not also a real estate agent and is also a full-time relocation professional. The two main reasons are the conflict of interest involved and the experience with more than just finding somewhere to live.

Evan: We actually had two agents: an initial one assigned through our company's arrangement who was dismal, and a second one found by Jana (at Enter Berlin), who is outstanding. I'll try to come up with some simple practical suggestions for finding a good agent.

Be sure your agent is a full-time, experienced relocation agent, and not a part-timer or student hired for the occasional odd assignment. I don't care how well-versed a student is in the differences between your culture/language and Germany's, he won't have the contacts established within the governmental bureaucracies and with school headmasters to make things happen for you, he won't have a clue about things like business phone needs and mobile telephone calling plans – I could go on forever.

Be sure they have a local office where you can rely on getting in touch with someone. If it's a one-person show, you could be out of luck in your moment of need when you need a quick answer. If you're moving to Berlin and their office is in Frankfurt, then how much are they likely to know about the details of Berlin?

Get and check references. Fail to do so at your extreme peril.

Jana: Oh, Evan, you did so much better than me answering this. Gave me some great ideas. Here's questions I would ask:

First ask questions about “red tape” issues. For example, “What are the requirements to live in Germany? What are the requirements to work in Germany? Can I drive with my current license? Are there any limitations on this? What schools are recommended and the features/drawbacks of each.” These answers should be complete enough that you feel comfortable. Of course a reloc agent isn't going to give you a highly detailed list, but the answers should give you confidence that they know what they are talking about. For example, if they say that there will be no problems with your driving in Germany with your US license... problem! (This actually was told to some of our friends here. We sent them to our Enter Berlin who straightened things out quickly for them!) Things should make sense, especially considering Germany is a very rule-based society. That which is not explicitly allowed is forbidden. Is that the saying?

Second, ask lots of questions to potential agent, like their list of services with prices, list of references, experience, etc. Just like interviewing someone for a job. They should list working with you on a timeline for your relocation; organizing the physical move (house hunting, school hunting (if you have kids), movers, damage claims, etc); obtaining your residence, work, and driving permits; signing kids up for school; getting a dog license; etc., etc. The list continues! They should not be afraid to give you information, as trust me, there is enough work to do, i.e., their value is not so much in this information, but they should know the procedures like the back of their hand.

GW&M: What was your move like? Would you do anything differently now?

Jana: Our move was pretty uneventful. Evan and I are both pretty natural planners, so nothing went horribly wrong, or even somewhat wrong. I do recommend drawing out timelines to plan your journey, especially with someone experienced, or using online or offline resources as a guide. There are so many things changing that it is easy to get one wrong. For example, due to our changing timeline, we had problems with the dogs and having the shots done at the right times. (Bringing dogs is possible, but it is also complicated.) The resolution was that I came over three days earlier than Evan, and Evan flew in on the day of an important meeting for us. Stress that we didn't really need. And to be sure, we had not planned our trip to the day, but it was moved up by two weeks. So, my advice is to plan to be flexible and try to make sure you can alter your plans by weeks (either way).

Evan: We can't really offer a lot of advice on how to find good movers, since we simply had movers contracted by our company and they did a great job. Since a US-to-Europe move takes about 5-8 weeks door-to-door, we chose to have our house emptied out in the US several weeks prior to our departure, getting us our belongings in Berlin that much sooner after our arrival. This was done under the logic that we had more friends to mooch from in the US, than we were likely to have in the first month in Germany.

We thought we were clever for having several boxes of day-to-day stuff shipped over by FedEx so we could use it until the last minute in the US and then immediately in our new home. Unfortunately the German Zoll (customs office) demanded a stack of paperwork (all stamped by the appropriate authority) – AND we didn't have Enter Berlin [now known as irema Relocation Services GmbH, ed.] at the time – that delayed delivery for a week and a half. So the moral is, do plan to stay in a hotel if allowed by your company, because things don't always happen quickly or easily over borders.

In Part 3: Finding an apartment in Berlin. A 16-page lease agreement? Berlin as a place to live. Getting around in Germany/Europe. Advice: The “Expat Top 10”

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